I have an important update from Dunedin Airport.
Along with security checks, baggage checks and passport checks, they’re now monitoring new hugging checks.
Passengers at this New Zealand airport have been told to limit farewell hugs to three minutes with authorities insisting it is not a Monty Python sketch but instead an attempt to ease traffic flow through the drop-off zone and that “prolonged embracing is still permitted in a nearby car park”.
Well thank goodness for that.
Needless to say this rather po-faced new measure has sparked a reaction with speculation that hugging police will need to start patrolling terminals on the lookout for anyone breaching the limit.
Experts have weighed in with learned articles on the science of hugging, suggesting that 10-15 seconds is the maximum time needed to release the happy hormones we get from a cuddle.
Any longer might be considered excessive, and three minutes way over the top.
The hugging police have been issued with hormone release alarms.
I did make that bit up, but the rest is true.
But being a 3ologist … this got me thinking.
If we’re no longer allowed to hug for three minutes then what are the best ways to spend that amount of time?
Here’s my Top Three suggestions:
1. Listen to God Only Knows
Three minutes is thought to be the optimum length for a pop single but few of them end bang on time. This Beach Boys’ classic does.
Disappointingly “Three Minute Hero” by The Selector overruns by 3 seconds.
2. Begin a chore
The hardest part of any task you don’t want to do is getting started.
Spend three focused minutes on it and you probably won’t finish, but you’ll be well on your way.
3. Look at a tree
We all know the beneficial effects of the natural world on mental health, and three minutes of reflection while gazing at a wonder of nature can only do us the power of good.
Ps: i’m pleased to report that authorities at Heathrow Airport have confirmed capacity for “Unlimited Hugs”